AP Lit Exam

For the longest time, I wasn't sure what to think of this exam.

First, I heard how long it was.

Great...

Then, I heard how much writing it was...

Perfect...

Then... I took it.

I gotta say, it really wasn't as bad as I thought it would be.  I actually understood all of the literary terms in the multiple choice for once.  That usually doesn't happen to me.  I found all of the excerpts and poems on the multiple easy to understand and interpret, although I usually interpret things a little differently than those who make the test.  I thought the multiple choice section flew by, and it really was not nearly as hard as I expected it to be.  There even was a poem that we read in class, how awesome is that?

Next up... the free response.  Gulp.

Wasn't looking forward to the two hours of writing I was about to do.  First essay?  Literary techniques of a poem, easy peasy.  Second essay?  Hard to interpret excerpt from a book, ouch.  Third essay?  Discuss a coming of age story from a book a literary merit?  Batta-bing batta-boom. Their Eyes Were Watching God, here I come. Pretty sure I nailed that essay, all thanks to all the work we did in class of course (Thanks Ms. Healey).  I could not have been happier with the first and third essays, however, I will admit that the second essay was pretty tough.  Not really sure what that passage was even referring to, and I'm not going to even try.

Surprisingly, well... not really, I think I did the best on this exam than the rest of my exams.  I completely bombed Calc and I thought I did decent on Physics, but let me tell you... I was impressed with how I think I did on Lit.

We'll have to see, though, let's hope I didn't jinx myself and get a 2, because that would be downright embarrassing.

All in all, I am really glad I chose to take the class, and I will miss all the funny and good times I had in Ms. Healey's class the last two years.

Losses

This is a follow-up to my last post.

My high school career is over, obviously.

With that... however, a few things have/are ending, and it's really quite sad.

Firstly, I am finished (as of now) with organized sports.  From as long as I can remember, I have played sports.  Basically that dates back to me being about four or five years old playing sports year round.  For the most part, I don't have any complaints, and I love all the people and coaches I have met through them.  Sports really have helped shape me into a better person.  Unless I decide to walk-on to UD's football team, I will be officially done with sports, excluding all the club teams and such I will play in college for fun.

What I'll especially miss is football.  Some of my best memories have come from football games, practices, and workouts.  People see the football team or games and think they're just another sport, and some people flat out don't like the football team, but I will bet my life on it that no other team, no other club, no other activity puts more effort and work into perfecting something than the football team.  I was at St. Mark's five days each week for two to three hours during the summer working to get better and have the best season I could possibly have.  That's in the blazing heat, working my butt off to get faster, stronger, quicker, bigger, etc.  I don't regret any of it.  I love the fact I managed to run in such heat for an extended period of time.  I don't think I'll ever do something as hard as that in my life, and nobody truly understands how difficult it is unless you've experienced it for yourself.  And this doesn't just stop after summer, in season, you are constantly working out, studying, perfecting your skill to become the best you can be even though the season is already here.  And what happens the week after football ends?  Boom, workouts for the next year start.  It's a never-ending cycle of preparing yourself for those Friday nights.  All this work with your teammates, however, builds some of the most closely knitted friendships I'll ever have.  You depend on each other to keep pushing through adversity, you depend on each other to motivate you to work harder, and you depend on each other to have your back off the field as well.  I will never forget my experience with football, and it is sad that the season is now long gone.

The second thing, I will keep it very brief, is a long-term relationship that I had.
Lasting a little over two year, it's safe to say it was my longest relationship.  I won't say much because that's personal and I don't want to put that online, but it is saddening to me that the relationship is over, but I am very glad it happened.  Hey, life goes on though.  We will still be attending prom together and hopefully have a great time!

It is also very sad that I will be leaving a school that I have come to accept as my second home.  I literally spend more time at St. Mark's than I do at home, and I wouldn't have it any other way.  Dang, that was corny.

The End of My Career

High School is over.
Scary thought isn't it?

And come to think of it, I have to say it's truly saddening to see that the class I have bonded with and has become so intertwined in my own life is now... being split apart.

Yes, many of my friends are going to the same college as I am, UD, but friends don't always remain friends in college.

I will miss the simple days of laughing at lunch, getting in trouble for stupid things, messing around in class, and, in general, just knowing my class so personal.  Being an athlete and in clubs, I am able to interact with kids from all phases, not just my own, and I will have to admit I have met some amazing people over the years.  Just so many different types of people that I admire and wish that I had a trait or two like theirs.  It is upsetting to think that many people that I have become friends with I will never see again, but at least I am glad to say I had an opportunity to meet them.

I just wish I became as close as I have these last few months with my friends a little sooner, yaknow?  Over these last few months, I have strengthened some already strong friendships and had some of the best nights and times I have ever had in my life.  I have really learned to love each and every one of my friends, but it is weird to say that things will never be the same.

I can't say I want to grow up just yet.  I'm sure many of us feel this way, but I truly mean it when I say I wish I could stay this age for a much longer time.  After realizing how important my friends are to me, I want to spend time with them before I move on to the next stage of my life.

College will undoubtedly be an amazing experience, and one that I can say I feel prepared for.  I understand it won't be easy becoming a computer science engineer, especially when my competition is kids like Chris Bubel.  However, technology is one of my callings and I strongly believe that I will be able to succeed if I sit down and apply myself, which is something I can safely say I expect myself to do.  I am excited to move on with my life, even though I am not quite done with this current chapter.

It's too bad time doesn't wait for you to be ready; Time just pushes you out the door and expects you to be prepared.  I mean, I guess I'm ready.  We'll have to see.

"Don't let that horse"

The final poem I looked at for my paper was a comedic poem, a side I had not yet seen from Lawrence Ferlinghetti.


This poem, "Don't let that horse," is much more informal than his other works, although they are also very informal.  The line spacing, the diction, and the structure is just more irregular than I am used to when reading his poetry.

The poem can be hard to interpret, mainly because I bet any of the people that read this poem look way too far into it.  The poem describes an incident between a mother and son, in which the mother tells her son that he should not paint the painting he is working on.  The son ignores her request and continues to paint.  The painting is a huge success, and this newfound success would not have occurred had he listened to his mother's advice.

Very simple story, very simple moral... right?

WRONG.

No, actually, yes, it is right.  At least, in my opinion it is.  I believe that Ferlinghetti wanted to create a simple story, in poem form, about painting, a hobby that he loved.  The poem is humorous because of its simplicity and overall topic.  This simplicity gives a moral... that one should take risks and be the person they want to be (again, going back to "Constantly Risking Absurdity?").  There really is not much more to it than that.  Sure, I am sure somebody could look much more further into it than I did and find some obscure or abstract meaning, but I am sticking with my gut on this one.

I bet Ferlinghetti threw this piece together not to give us some deep, intellectual moral to reflect on, but to tell a short story about a boy and his mother, a story that just happens to have a simple moral.  Kinda similar to a children's book, am I right?

I think this poem was enjoyable because it was the final poem I picked, therefore after struggling to figure out what the other three's meanings were, I could just sit back and take this poem in as is without too much involvement.  Nothing wrong with that!

"Bird with Two Right Wings"

What a perfect picture to go along with this next poem...



In his next work, "Bird with Two Right Wings," Lawrence Ferlinghetti discusses his views on the United States of America's political situation.

I find the name to be very, very humorous.  One, because "bird" is a reference to the bald eagle, and two "right wings."  "Right wings" is very controversial because not only is he calling America a "screwed-up bird," he is referring to the US as a right-winged nation, that is, the US government believes in a separation of social status, whether they want to admit it or not.  I find it very funny that he decides to go that far.  I must say, that's a very heavy statement to make in such a critical country.

Now that I think about it... didn't the last poem I discuss have to do with making works that undergo positive and negative speculation, and that one's career relies on have a positive outcome?  Hmm... strange.

Anywho, I tend to stay away from discussing my own political views, and I also tend to stay away from titles, as I do not believe it is a good idea to identify yourself with just one type of idea.  I believe it would be much better if the world would call themselves independents, and accept ideas from everyone.  People need to be open-minded when it comes to new ideas.  I will stop there... it's annoying to talk politics because of corruption, fraud, fake personalities, false hope, and incorrect information that is literally thrown at our faces every day.  Gah! There I go again.

Back to the poem... I like hearing what Ferlinghetti has to say, and the metaphor that citizens are just helpless civilians in an airplane controlled solely by the pilot (the government) is very emotionally powerful and persuasive.  It is a very scary thought to imagine that our lives are completely controlled by "the system," and that there is nothing we can do about it.

I mean, it's tough to name things that the government doesn't control... Scary thought.

At the end of the day, however, we are very lucky to grow up in a country like the US.  People complain about our government and its corruption, but at least we do not live in a dictatorship of communist country.  We should also acknowledge that we are lucky.

"Constantly Risking Absurdity"

The next poem I wrote about is called "Constantly Risking Absurdity," by the same poet, Lawrence Ferlinghetti.

This poem was very interesting because of the extended metaphor between an acrobat and a poet.  I found this to be very creative and very well executed.  If I was told what this poem was about before I had read it, I most likely would have laughed at whoever told me so.

The poem simply compares the tough, stressful, and risky life of an acrobat to that of a poet, and successfully proves, at least, it did to me, that being a poet is really not all fun and games.  Poetry is a risky business to go into, or at least it seems like it after spending time with this poem.



And you know...

This can be said about life in general.  Nothing we do is done without risk.  Each step we take, each decision we consciously or unconsciously make, each action we perform has a cause and effect.  Many things we do in life are heavily speculated, similar to how the lives of an acrobat and poet are as well.

Many people do not understand the severity of their actions, but I, for one, am always constantly reminding and contemplating my actions.  If I do, however, fail to achieve the outcome I wanted, I learn from my mistakes.

"A Vast Confusion"

The first poem I dissected was "A Vast Confusion" by Lawrence Ferlinghetti.

From a personal standpoint, I found that I had to reread the poem quite a few times to understand what the heck he was talking about.  Heck, I still am not sure if I know what it's about or not.  I eventually decided that Ferlinghetti had been talking about his views on the world.  I believe he thinks that the world is a very chaotic place with all of its wars, factories, cars, gadgets, etc., yet he somehow still sees hope.  He tells how although society has forgotten about the true nature of the Earth, we, as a collection of people working towards one goal, can reverse the damage we have done.

I too believe that this is very possible.  Yes, there are a lot of things that humanity has screwed up:  Ecosystems, extinctions, pollution, just to name a few.  However, there is an unimaginable number of good things humans have accomplished.  I believe that humanity has come so far over these thousands and thousands of years that we have existed, and it would be a pity to somehow let the "chaos" destroy us all, at the very peak of our discoveries.  There is a way to undo the damage we have caused, and no, it is not easy. BUT, to allow the fact that the solution is not easy, be expensive, etc., to stop us from saving us from ourselves would be a shame.  It would be a shame to have humanity achieve such greatness in the small amount of time we have been in existence, and lose it all because of a few nuclear bombs.  Chaos surrounds us, and we fail to acknowledge it every single day.  Places like North Korea, for example, need to wake up and see the vast negative potential they have.  

We US citizens are especially not innocent either, but neither is the rest of the world.  Almost every nation contributes to the world's chaos in some way or another.  Some more than others, but we need to realize that we need to use our knowledge and power in a positive way.  Many nations have already taken steps to do so, and I am glad we have realized this.

From what I have seen my own generation accomplish so far gives me a good feeling about the future.  Thus far, I have noticed just how intelligent, caring, and hardworking many people around my age are, and I am hoping this contributes to unscrambling the chaos.